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How do you guys deal with people who treat your reading passion as it is something useless? (Specially when it comes from some close friends)

How do you guys deal with people who treat your reading passion as it is something useless? (Specially when it comes from some close friends)

Malja #questionnaire

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142 Answers

Janet

Get different friends

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s a good advice ?

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Lysa

None of my friends or family see it as useless, but they do definitely see it as a weird quirk. If someone I meet thinks it’s stupid I shrug it off. I’m sure they do something I think is silly or pointless.

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s a good idea. We can’t make everyone think the way we want..
Thanks 🙂

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Shelly

I don’t have friends who are like that??
Oh no…get new friends!

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MaljaQuestion author

I must say you’re lucky ! ?
Thanks, I will..

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Chau

I drop them like a hot tamale. There’s plenty of better friends!

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehe.. you’re right.. ?

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Maureen

Get the friends reading!

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MaljaQuestion author

Sure thing ?

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Sundaes

Buh…bye…NEXT!
only kidding. Just tell them it’s a hobby and your passion. Doesn’t have to be useful but tbh..reading improves so many things I don’t see it as being useless?

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehe
Sure. It’s good to discuss things with friends. ?
And you think like that cause you love reading (like me) .. but I’m talking about people who don’t.. they think books are only to spend your free time and it’s not productive ☹

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Sundaes

@Malja if that was true then why would the English curriculum include book reading for gcse? …its probably called something different now but in my days it was gsces!

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MaljaQuestion author

@Sundaes you’re right. Books increase our knowledge and they make us more understanding. Maybe if people read more, they wouldn’t think like that ?

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Sundaes

The Minds of Bookworms

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Sundaes

Books tap into our emotions so much as well. Empathy is something the majority of book readers have I reckon. We could do with more of that in this time and age

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MaljaQuestion author

@Sundaes you’re absolutely right ?

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Ana

I talk about it even more and try to show them the beauty of it (not to patronize them or to make them like it, but to make them -understand- it 🙂 ). Sometimes I’ll pick out a line or two that I know will speak to them, and sometimes they end up appreciating that 🙂 if not, to each their own!

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s awesome ! ?
I should try to do the same..
Thanks !

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Becky

Mine don’t understand either. I just remind them it’s my mode of relaxation

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s exactly what I try to tell them ?

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Becky

??

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Joanne

My family are fine – my parents encouraged us to read, so they accept I am a bookworm. I am not the only one, anyway!

As for friends, they accept I love a good book.

The one person in recent times who told me I was boring because of my hobbies was a lady I blocked two years ago now. She just needs to hang out with people she finds interesting and stop bothering with me altogether! It would be best for both of us!

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Vicky

Someone whom I consider as my best friend thinks the same. I just ignore her remark. I don’t hurt anyone by reading a book, so what. I’ll continue reading for as long as I’m able to regardless what people think of it.

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MaljaQuestion author

True. That’s the best thing to do. ?
I wonder why is it okay to keep looking at your cell phone during conversations and yet so offensive to read a book in a friends get to gather..

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Kristin

Just when did reading became something useless? One can actually LEARN something while reading? People don’t know what they’re missing out on not reading.

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MaljaQuestion author

Exactly ! That’s something people need to understand..

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Hoang

Ignore and walk away

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MaljaQuestion author

Best ! ?

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Silvana

totally ignoring them and go on reading 😀

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehe.. That’s great ?

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Shaima

Smile no more I always do that.

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MaljaQuestion author

I already have a serious face ?
#Introvert_Problems

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Katie

They wouldn’t be my friends for long

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MaljaQuestion author

I also feel more comfortable around people who do like to read ?

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Katie

I’m married to a man who doesn’t read and doesn’t get my reading but he doesn’t belittle it

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s great ! ?
And that’s what I expect from my non-reader friends, they may not like reading but they shouldn’t make me feel inferior for my passion..

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Angie

My friends are pretty accepting…yes they crack jokes, but they also ask me what I am reading now..and seem genuinely interested.

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MaljaQuestion author

Such friends are a blessing ! ?

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Andrea

Make fun of them

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehe.. I can try.. ?

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Yana

My father is actually like that. But I just tell him that it’s good that I’m into reading and not drugs.

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MaljaQuestion author

Yeah.. people should be proud to have readers around them ! ??

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Kayleigh

My friends and husband aren’t readers but they would never belittle me about my love of reading. Personally I’d get new friends

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s awesome ! I wish my friends could be that understanding ?

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Kate

Luckily all my Family n friends get me?

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s amazing ! ??

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Rabia

New friends. Or being alone. Or just don’t listen to them. Not all the comments are to be heard.

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MaljaQuestion author

Thanks !
That would be the best way to tackle the situation ?

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Rabia

@Malja no problem. I have been in the same shoes as you. Just be happy and let those minds be. They dont deserve you and you sure deserve better.
?

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MaljaQuestion author

@Rabia Thanks a lot !
I’ll sure keep that in my mind ❤

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Rabia

@Malja no problem. Happy to help ♡

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MaljaQuestion author

@Rabia ?❤

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Andrea

Never heard anyone ever tell me reading is useless. Maybe you need better friends

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MaljaQuestion author

I know.. I was literally heartbroken to hear my friends say that .

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Clara

You don’t need that kinda of negativity in your life….. free your mind….READ!! Sending love & light!!!?????

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MaljaQuestion author

Thank you so much !! ??❤❤

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Clara

Always here with love and support for a fellow Reader…..Education is our path to Freedom…a better tomorrow ???

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Clara

@Malja ??????

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MaljaQuestion author

❤❤❤❤❤❤

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JoAnn

I usually point out what their passion is and compare. If they are truly my friend, they get it.

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MaljaQuestion author

That’s great .. I’ll do the same thing next time ?

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Carmela

Confuse them with multi syllabic words and when they ask how you know such words tell them that’s one of the benefits of reading and then walk away

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MaljaQuestion author

Why didn’t I think of it before !!!
Thanks ??

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Rabia

Wow thats an awesome advice. I sure will do it more often too.♡

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Kayla

I mock their hobbies until they cry. Lol

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehehe ??

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Gwenn

I just shrug it off. I think TV is more useless, and more expensive

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Katie

Good point

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MaljaQuestion author

You’re absolutely right ! ?

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Niffer

I don’t really have any friends, but my coworkers are the people I interact with the most socially and many of them don’t understand my reading. They also don’t necessarily understand having pets. (It really surprises me how few of my coworkers have a pet.) I mostly try to find something else to discuss with them and try to find more like-minded people on FB or other social media.

If someone is really confrontational about my interests, I simply fall back on the whole “if everyone in the world had the same interests, the world would be a pretty boring place.”

And if that doesn’t shut them up, kick them in the knee.

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MaljaQuestion author

Lol ! The entire comment is so relatable .. ?
Social media is such a lifesaver !! ?

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Camille

I would tell them that I understand reading isn’t something that’s for everybody but it’s something that I love to do and I would appreciate if they stopped trying to make me feel bad about it. If they are your friends then they will respect your feelings. If they don’t stop then maybe they aren’t really your friends. What difference should it make to them if you like to read or not?

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MaljaQuestion author

Very well said .. ?❤

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Theresa

Smile, and keep reading. To thine own self be true.

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MaljaQuestion author

????

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Marwa

It’s worse when it’s one of your parents ?

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MaljaQuestion author

Yeah.. absolutely..

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Kristine

They aren’t really close friends if they don’t respect your interests.

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MaljaQuestion author

I agree.. ?

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Jennifer

I drop them

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MaljaQuestion author

Good advice ?

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LIz

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Julianna

I was wearing my sweatshirt that says ; so many books so little time. This person that I’d never met called me a Geek! Wow

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MaljaQuestion author

I would love to have that sweatshirt though ?

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Caitlyn

I say let your geek flag fly! They’re the ignorant ones, literally.

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Brenda

Ignore them!

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MaljaQuestion author

??

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Amy

i found other friends

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Indianna

I usually respond with atleast my hobby is cheaper. I could buy 3 books with the amount you spend on your foundation so let’s not knock what each other loves and shushhhhhh ?

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MaljaQuestion author

Hahaha .. that’s awesome ! ??

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Maia

One of my sisters mocks my reading habits. Can’t really drop her. She thinks that it’s the stupidest thing in the world. Like, I get if it’s not your thing. Most of my family aren’t big readers. But I don’t make fun of her hobbies that I think are stupid.

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MaljaQuestion author

I can understand how it feels..

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Vivi

Reading = stupid? LOL OKAY.

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Lila

I consider it a severe limitation on their part, like a disability, really, if they are not able to enjoy reading. I might raise my eyebrows and smile at their comments, but otherwise not engage. You don’t need somebody else’s approval to love to read.

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Maia

Some people just don’t enjoy reading. I respect that. I don’t see it as a disability at all. We all have different interests. I just don’t like her attitude. She isn’t respectful to me at all about it. Because it isn’t important to her, then it shouldn’t be important to anyone or else you’re stupid and weird. That’s my problem with it, not the fact that she doesn’t read.
I’m hoping that it’s something she’ll grow out of. She’s a teenager. Maybe she’ll grow out of her attitude in five years…I hope.

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Vivi

I mean, I know people with dyslexia who are still avid readers.

I honestly think people who don’t enjoy reading got burnt out from required reading and hasn’t discovered books that they would enjoy yet.

The problem here is that they’re people who judge others for what they do for fun. That’s just shitty.

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Maia

My dad doesn’t have dyslexia, but he has trouble focusing on reading. He uses audio books and loves them. My sister (a different one than I mentioned above) had the same problem as he does and has decided that she hates reading. She has loved Harry Potter and Twilight and even read Twilight more than once. So, I honestly don’t think she hates reading, just hasn’t given it enough of a chance and thinks of it as uncool. And my dad is living proof that you can be a reader despite having trouble reading in the “normal” way.
So, I get it. And my other sister doesn’t look down on my reading, the one who’s only read HP and Twilight. She respects it. Which I’m thankful for.
I don’t know. Maybe my sister who disses reading would like it if she gave it a chance. But I’m honestly not sure that she would. I just wish that she could be respectful of my love of reading like the rest of my family is. It really hurts.

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Linda

Each to their own, but I don’t really understand people who do not enjoy one kind or book at least. Having said that, though, my husband was never bothered about reading until he got into his 30s, so I’m not unfamiliar with the idea, but he was never rude about my passion for books. I think he just didn’t get it and I suppose with him being dyslexic, it was never going to be his most favourite pass time. He now devours Jack Reacher books… things change?

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MaljaQuestion author

I don’t have words.. your comment gave me hope.. maybe someday my friends would also understand it.. ??

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Elaine

I find this situation to be completely ridiculous. How can another person judge another persons hobby or passion? Every person has something: cooking, travel, movies, vid games, working out, knitting, art, make up and fashion, etc… Some people have no interest in those things but that doesn’t mean it’s a waste of time. People need to get over themselves!

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MaljaQuestion author

You’re right. It’s high time we stop judging people for what they like and what they find valuable in life..

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Vivi

I have noticed that people who don’t have hobbies do this.

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Elaine

@Vivi
They might not call it a hobby but everyone has soemthing they do to fill their down time. My grandparents didn’t have hobbies but they gardened, traveled, read differnt news papers, watched baseball, etc…is that what makes the differnce? Variety?

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Vivi

I juggle my hobbies, but I still obsessively throw myself into each of them. Maybe the extreme focus is the difference.

1
Eniola

I would say find new friends but it’s not always easy or smart to do that but I can say ignore them but honestly it will get to you sometimes so fight fire with fire….. go for something they like also,(PS this isn’t the best advice to be honest), make fun of something they love and if they get hurt you can just say “oh it hurts huh well I advice you not to speak about my reading again and I won’t speak about this again” (I REPEAT IT’S NOT THE BEST IDEA)??but you have us who love reading like you❤️

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MaljaQuestion author

Hehehe.. thank you so much ! ??
I’ll be careful about implementing the advice ??

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Eniola

??❤️❤️

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MaljaQuestion author

I’m glad to know that.. ??

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Vivi

Thankfully, no one I know does that, so I guess I’m choosy about who I keep around. My friends and I are all avid gamers and my best friends and I read as well as craft together.

When people have hobbies, they tend to know better than to shit on what other people do for fun.

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Viktorija

Ignore them as best as I can until I can’t and then all hell breaks loose ?

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Kaitlin

Don’t be friends with them. Why would you engage and interact with someone who’s mean to you? Love yourself enough to get rid of toxic people.

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Angie

ignore it.

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Estherjane

Ignore them

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Gary

Life is too short to deal with people who do not understand or are not fellow readers. Let them fall by the wayside and replace them with readers.

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Sandi

I don’t call out all the things I may find useless about people because we all have different value in life!

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Paul

It says more about them than it does yourself. Anyway, at my age I’ve learned not to give a sh*t what people think about me.

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Tasha

Hit them with the book I’m reading ?

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Kate

Love it!!?

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Cathy

Why do you even care? Read on!

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Rhonda

Honestly- I don’t keep anyone around that’s toxic to me. Including family. I don’t mean they disagree with me, I get ill from them being in my life. If I can’t make it improve, or I don’t even want bother, I cut them off.

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Kip

Before I wrote a book myself, I used to really downplay how much I read. I’m not sure why I did this. Unless people absolutely adore books it’s hard for them to understand why someone would read more than a few books a week. Now though they seem to expect that I read a lot since I wrote a book. Although admittedly I don’t have quite as much time to read as I used to because of all the writing. I also don’t clean as much as I used to… I need to go do the dishes and listen to an audiobook at the same time. Wait I probably should put a Shameless plug in here. If you’re looking for a super nerdy book check mine out. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B075B1F143/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_yI-WAb7EKQW2G

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Latanya

I don’t deal with the irrelevant opinions of people who don’t have a passion for books.

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Kenyatta

Find new friends that enjoy the same thing you do

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Jacqueline

Find new friends who love reading as much as you do and respect it, as well.

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Savarna

I would probably find others to hang out with. I do have friends who don’t like to read that pay people out for their interests. I lalso have friends who are massive readers and have pretty similar book tastes. The only person who pays me out is my sister who calls me a loser for getting excited about books and loves to read, kind of hurts but I generally try ignore it.

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Taylor

Girl i roll my eyes and text my book friends

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Kristi

Ignore them.

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Kristin

I have my book bestie @Juan to discuss books with. No one else knows how much and exactly what I read…. my list is dangerous ? NSFW

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Juan

Lol… you always find the bestest books to read… ?

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Linda

Ignore them. Move on. Find bookish friends.

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Brooklyn

It used to bother me, but now i don’t care. I figure they don’t know what they’re missing out on ?

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Sam

When they judge my reading is useless, I think two things. 1. They are entitled to their opinion. 2. They are someone who needs to judge.

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Maureen

Get your friends reading, I have done it, now they borrow my books which is fine.

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Kinsey

My friends are all pretty big readers, at least they were back in high school. A lot of them have “no time” to read now. My family doesn’t have a problem with my love of books, but my siblings find the “types” of books I read stupid.

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Ivana

I follow the Star Trek Prime Directive: Do not interfere with primitive cultures 🙂

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Tamara

Maybe they’re secretly jealous of you because they cannot read? ?

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MaljaQuestion author

That could be true ??

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Amy

Friends should support not belittle. People that do that should be ashamed and aren’t really your friends. The next time they give you a hard time about your reading stand up, look at them, shake your head sadly and walk away. If they ask you what’s wrong tell them that what they’re doing hurts your feelings and that you are not gonna deal with it anymore. That if they were truly your friend they would grow up and find their own positive hobby and support you in your own! ?

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MaljaQuestion author

Thank you so much for the beautiful advice ?❤

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Katie

Absolutely. Well said!

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Cheryl

My mother used to say, “Consider the source and ignore it.” ??

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